Tag: Positive thinking

Reflection on the power of reflections

On By AlfonsIn Getting things doneLeave a comment

Recent performance discussions with my team prompted me to muse a little bit about reflections and the power of reflective thinking. In my mind, the biggest single value of formal performance discussions is that it prompts us to pause, reflect, and decide what we want to take away and change from those insights. Forget the forms and processes – instead, focus on the insights you can take away.

So here it goes, my reflection on the power and value of (more than annual) reflections.

Reflect to celebrate and be proud

The most immediate benefit we get from reflecting on what happened in the past is usually a feeling of accomplishment and happiness. All too often, we are solely focused on what lies ahead, and we miss recognizing and being proud of what we have already achieved. Especially in today’s busy life, it is easy to look back at a day, week, month, or year and wonder what we had actually done and accomplished during that time.

Continuously and frequently reflecting allows us to balance the scale and not only see what still lies ahead but also be proud of what has already been accomplished. Write those accomplishments down to make them real for your brain; otherwise, they will be forgotten in an instant.

Reflect to celebrate. Reflect to be proud. Reflect to feel accomplished and happy.

Reflect to acknowledge and share appreciation

Similarly, we often forget to appreciate contribution and achievement from the ones who help us move along – family, friends, co-workers. Reflection is an opportunity to pause, think about all the help we received along the way, and express a quick but heartfelt “Thank you”.

We can only succeed together, and the true leader is not defined by what they accomplish but how they engage those around them to boldly go beyond their perceived limitations.

Reflect to say thank you. Reflect to appreciate. Reflect to encourage.

Reflect to learn

Last not least, we all make mistakes all the time. And that’s ok. It’s how we learn and grow.

Reflection helps us to analyze situations in hindsight and with the 20:20 vision that hindsight provides. If we don’t reflect, we are bound to make the same mistakes over and over again. If we reflect, learn, and adjust future actions accordingly, we will embrace those slips and use them as inspiration to grow.

The only thing we can really change is the “Man in the mirror” as the famous philosopher Michael Jackson told us back in 1988 (yep, I know, I just dated myself).

Hindsight is 20:20. However, you can only benefit from this clarity if you look back with the intent to learn.

As you dive into your reflections, find ways to share them. Keep everyone on the same page and take the people in your life along your learning journey. Do this, and you will get double the benefit for the same amount of time and work.

Reflections are a powerful tool, and they are a lot of fun once you get into the habit. You can do them daily (e.g., journals, work logs), weekly (e.g., status updates, learnings, plans for the coming week, this email), annually (e.g., annual discussions, progress on strategic goals, and necessary course corrections, post-mortems), or anywhere in between. The more often you reflect on past experiences and outcomes and let those reflections inform future priorities and corrective actions, the more you will benefit. Personally, I do all three of them.



Did you like this post? Want to read more? Check out our newest book!

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is thriving-in-high-pressure-environments-paperback-cover.jpg

Thriving in High-Pressure Environments
Lessons from Amazon, a global pandemic, and other crazy times
By Alfons and Ulrike Staerk
ISBN 9798718017663

Find it on Amazon: Paperback, Kindle

If you like what you’re reading, please consider leaving a review on Amazon. If you don’t like it, please tell us what we can do better the next time. As self-published authors we don’t have the marketing power of big publishing houses. We rely on word of mouth endorsements through reader reviews.

Perceived constraints

On By AlfonsIn Getting things doneLeave a comment
constraints

Let me begin with a little story

A while ago, I read a story about how elephants are trained not to run away from their owners.

What the trainers do is tie elephants up with chains while they are young and weak. The young elephants learn quickly that they cannot break the chains or tear down the walls they are tied to. They are too small and too weak.

Later, as they grow up, those same elephants tear down walls and lug around trees all day long. However, they continue to obey their chains even though they could easily snap them.

Why do those mighty animals not run away towards greener pastures? Well, they learned a long time ago that they could not break the chains, and they stopped trying.

How does this apply to all of us?

Have you ever heard: “We tried that before.” or “This is how we always did it.” or “This could create a problem.”?

All of the above are forms of perceived constraints. We think something won’t work, but we haven’t actually tried it (or even given it a deep thought). It even might not have worked in the past, but well, guess what, the world changes – all the time.

What didn’t work in the past might be one of the greatest ideas today. Does anyone remember how Steve Balmer was convinced that phones without a keyboard wouldn’t sell? That was true at a time, but when Balmer made that statement, it was long expired.

We often limit ourselves by what we think are constraints – but are they really constraints? Do they need to be?

Some of the constraints we see are real. However, most will turn out to be learned or assumed.

Don’t hold yourself back by what you think are your constraints. Never stop re-visiting, never stop trying, never stop looking for new data or changed circumstances.

It is critical to understand your constraints. However, which of them are real, and which of them need some poking and testing to see if they still apply? Always ask what underlying factors drove those constraints and if those factors still apply. Do you have new solutions (new technology, skills, people, changed policy) at your disposal that might circumvent those previous constraints?

Of course, there are hard and real constraints as well – I can jump out the window as often as I want, I will not grow wings and start flying. However, for every constraint (or challenge) that you face, you need to clearly determine if it’s perceived or real.

If it’s perceived, discard it right away and move on. If it’s real, think about how you can work with or around that constraint.

If you face a real constraint, come up with a plan to deal with it:

  • Blocking scope – What specifically is that constraint blocking? Part of what you want to achieve or all? If it’s just a part, get started with the things you can do and take it from there.
  • Underlying drivers – What is causing that constraint? Can it be negotiated, even just for a small experiment?
  • Risk versus benefit – What would happen if you would give up the constraint? What could go wrong, what’s the worst case? Is it really so bad that you need to give up the improvement opportunity?
  • Be creative – Is there a way around a specific constraint? Can you develop a different solution to overcome the constraint?

On the point about me jumping out the window and trying to fly – if I were smart, I could take advantage of new technologies like a nice parachute.

Discard perceived constraints. Respect real constraints and work with them.

Did you like this post? Want to read more? Check out our newest book!

Thriving in High-Pressure Environments
Lessons from Amazon, a global pandemic, and other crazy times
By Alfons and Ulrike Staerk
ISBN 9798718017663

Find it on Amazon: Paperback, Kindle

If you like what you’re reading, please consider leaving a review on Amazon. If you don’t like it, please tell us what we can do better the next time. As self-published authors we don’t have the marketing power of big publishing houses. We rely on word of mouth endorsements through reader reviews.

Assume positive intent!

On By AlfonsIn Getting things done, Healthy habitsLeave a comment

I had a few pretty contentious meetings this week. My first reaction was probably the same that most people have in such situations – somewhere between: “Really!?” and “What the…!”.

It’s easy to get protective or even combative if you have a lot going on. When in stress, we tend to develop tunnel vision and assume we’re the only ones who have the right solution. We don’t understand why everyone else is so difficult to deal with. It’s a fight-or-flight reaction that our brain falls back to in an attempt to ‘simplify’ our world view in situations of stress and perceived danger. It allows us to react fast and decisively – however, not always smartly.

Unfortunately, the reality is never that simple.

Being in a few such situations this week, I took a deep breath and remembered a training on unconscious bias that I attended a while ago. One of the principles they mentioned in that training is to assume positive intent.

Instead of thinking, “WTF, I’ll set you straight on this…”, rather take a deep breath, and then take another one. Assume positive intent – very few people want to cause trouble, and almost everyone has good intentions that drive their point of views and behaviors. Everyone has good reasons and wants to do the right things.

Assuming positive intent helps you to take some of the emotions out of an interaction. It allows you to take the other’s perspective for a moment and see things through their eyes. You will be able to understand where they are coming from, or if you don’t, you will at least be curious enough to investigate and (hopefully) ask them. There are so much power and beauty in actually talking to people instead of just assuming.

Assuming positive intent, and seeking to understand what the other person wants to achieve, will help you to understand their goals. More often than not, those goals will not be too different from yours. You might identify a shared vision with the other person, and with that, find a solution that leads to a win-win for everyone.

Sometimes it’s hard when emotions are high, but take a few deep breaths, assume positive intent, put yourself in the other person’s shoes and see what new solutions arise from that expanded perspective.

Did you like this post? Want to read more?

Check out our book for more thoughts and a week-by-week guide to make strategic changes to improve your health, career, and life purpose:

Put on your oxygen mask first - book cover

Put On Your Own Oxygen Mask First
A practical guide to living healthier, happier and more successful in 52 weekly steps
By Alfons and Ulrike Staerk
ISBN 9781077278929

Find it on Amazon: Paperback, Kindle

If you like what you’re reading, please consider leaving a review on Amazon. If you don’t like it, please tell us what we can do better the next time. As self-published authors we don’t have the marketing power of big publishing houses. We rely on word of mouth endorsements through reader reviews.